Completely infatuated by an older married man!

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The thing is why do older men insist on chasing 18-23 year olds. I would never normally have thought of what I'm about to say acceptable, but I often think that if Craig does share my feelings, that we should sleep together, just once, as it's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for him and for me, though more so for him - he's unlikely to have another young woman like me come by and feel the way I do about him and I'm unlikely to meet another attractive, decent, older man like him who I could sleep with I've always wanted to try sleeping with an older, more experienced man. Good day Souls may you all find Love and acceptance and wholeness and honoring of your self first , so that one day you can honor others in reverence, not in what you have to gain.

I experienced the lesson my teacher, Brugh, had shared with me years earlier. The fact that he hasn't given you any obvious hint about feeling the same way doesn't necessarily mean that he doesn't like you too, but more likely shows that he probably doesn't think having an affair with you is a good idea. Why is it, he asked, that they analyse every word, searching for hidden meanings, getting hysterical if he puts only one 'x' at the end of a message instead of three? On the other hand, infatuation consumes, either consciously or unconsciously, physical beauty, for breakfast, lunch and dinner!

My wife is infatuated with another man

It is not uncommon to have Infatuation and love compared. In most comparisons, infatuation is treated as a dangerous phenomenon, whereas love is shown to be healthy. The fundamental question that needs to be asked, however, often remains unanswered: what is infatuation, and how is it different from love? In my humble opinion, and based on a lot of experience, at the risk of sounding extremely immature, I believe that infatuation is akin to driving a race car at over 300 kilometres an hour along country roads. It is an experience that is intense, and which provides a massive rush of excitement to the driver. Love, on the other hand is like riding a vintage car that has been tried and tested and which has always managed to cope with local road conditions, no matter how difficult. Infatuation is almost always discovered in terms of a growing interest in another person, usually belonging to another gender. A clear sign of infatuation is the desire to be with the other person at any cost. Over a period of time, generally gradually, but sometimes rapidly, the other person takes the lion's share of all the thoughts of the infatuated person. The infatuated person spends day and night thinking only about the other person, often losing a lot of sleep. A person who is infatuated becomes extremely emotional even if the emotionality is not clearly manifested. A person in infatuation attempts to fit a certain standard of acceptability in terms of physical appearance and personality, in order to interest the other. Finally, the infatuated person develops a certain kind of false optimism that fails to see reason, only considering the remote possibility of being with the other as the reality that has been destined by supernatural forces. The infatuation seems to becomes the center of the universe, when in fact, it clearly isn't. The beginning of infatuation is almost always an ominous sign of the difficult times t come. Once infatuation has set in, it is almost impossible to roll back and will take its course. Infatuation causes a disconnect from reality. The person of attraction becomes the 'be-it' and 'end-all' of the infatuated person's existence. Every action that the infatuated person performs is designed towards the end of obtaining the desired person, much like winning a trophy. Oftentimes, the behaviour of the person in infatuation changes drastically. Mood swings become common, the person alternating between an unbelievable ecstasy and unbearable depression. The frequent oscillation between extreme ecstasy and depression causes the onset of a long period of physical and emotional tiredness that is quite hard to get past. Love provides one with a sense of security while infatuation creates insecurity. Love is not a feeling but an unchanging desire to be selfless. Love is prepared to make sacrifices. A person who is in true love is prepared even to leave the partner if it is required to ensure his or her happiness. Infatuation appropriates for itself. The loss of a partner is unimaginable and debilitating to a person in infatuation. Unlike infatuation, love is not affected by the vagaries of circumstance. Love, once established, stays. True lovers have a sane and realistic vision for the future. Infatuated people live in a present that is changing by the moment. A seeming lack of physical beauty can never be of detriment to love. On the other hand, infatuation consumes, either consciously or unconsciously, physical beauty, for breakfast, lunch and dinner! Love is manufactured by true lovers and shared with the world they inhabit. Infatuation makes infatuated people neglect the world around them, especially their family, friends, and all those they are capable of spending time with. One or two experiences of infatuation in the teenage years are almost a certainty. However, repeatedly becoming infatuated is a sign of immaturity. Confront the reality of people around you. Realize that everyone is human and prone to weaknesses. No one, he or she, is your perfect match. True love is always an imperfect match. Get into the habit of listening to opinions contrary to your own, as and when you encounter them. This is a healthy habit that will widen your perspective of life. Very importantly, and I recommend this useful practice. Pick out a trustworthy and elderly person of your own gender, a mature person, to confide in. It is good to let off emotional steam once in a way. A mature person is capable of handling it without becoming judgmental, and in the process, will also give you precious guidance and a new understanding. You do not need to share every little element of your life with such a person, or for that matter, with anyone, but if anything is troubling you and affecting your functioning, you must get it off your chest. Infatuation is not a crime. It is a phenomenon that occurs in virtually every person's life. It is a barometer of one's progress in becoming a balanced and mature person, sensible and capable of supporting a family. Now that you know a fair bit about what goes on with a person in infatuation, read the signs and provide support as and when required. Infatuation is a global phenomenon and one that occurs in virtually every single person's life regardless of gender. Never beat yourself up if you think you have become infatuated with someone despite your best efforts not to get emotionally involved. Experience is a great teacher. Have an open mind, and you will learn some lessons that will prove to be invaluable in the future. This article makes love sound really lame and boring. To use the metaphor here, if I knew I would never get to go 300 km again, driving would be pointless, except as a utility function and, if the car was sentient, it might agree with me strange that the metaphor for a thing that supposed to be about giving makes the other party and inanimate object. Sure, we all have to be sensible sometimes but if there aren't also times when we can let go and enjoy ourselves, what's the point of life? Further, the dichotomy set up in this article makes love look as unrealistic and idealized as infatuation. I think the current trend of trying to portray love and infatuation as totally separate and to vilify infatuation and exonerate love ignores the more nuanced and messy reality that is human life. My relationship is a total pick and mix from both sides of the chart here and I imagine many relationships look like that. It's totally possible to obsess and swoon over someone's imperfections and to believe that you are destined to be together despite flaws or even elements of incompatibility. I constantly beat myself up for it but after reading that it is normal and that many people share this experience, I feel better. I have decided to stop being so hard on myself. Many thanks for this article. The table comparing infatuation to love appears to imply that infatuation is largely negative, and love positive, but fails to acknowledge that there are positive and negative aspects of both. While I agree with the majority of the article, I don't believe it's as clear cut as the article suggests. But maybe that's because I'm currently suffering from infatuation. I figured out 20 years later that a crushing infatuation I had, which altered the course of my life, was merely a projection of feelings of true love I had for someone else. It would be nice to have had a clue a bit earlier. But with matters of the heart, I am one of those people woefully inept. I have been through and emotional nightmare for a few weeks, with seemingly no control over my roller-coaster emotions, which have ranged from euphoric to suicidal. This is the third time this has happened to me, and I am not young - I am 61 years old. It is a very painful condition, from which I am slowly recovering. Thank you for the article - a reader in Ireland. Infatuation is nothing more than a chemical reaction towards someone you are attracted to that causes you to feel giddy and excited to be around them. A mature person knows and accepts that this is normal for the beginning of most relationships. Infatuation always fades so enjoy it while it lasts. However just understand it's phase one. Everything new becomes old. The purpose of the mind is to protect the heart. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. HubPages ® is a registered Service Mark of HubPages, Inc. 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A clear sign of infatuation is the desire to be with the other con at any cost. It is an experience that is intense, and which provides a massive rush of excitement to the driver. This is the third time this has happened to me, and I am not young - I am 61 years old. You need to know if he elements to have children. It would be nice to have had a clue a bit earlier. Tis getting late here. Also if there are other attributes they are seeking that I don't have I don't make contact. It takes a great deal of the pressure off of them and the glad. More than anything, though.